Back in Black(water)
Same Prince. New war. Less paperwork.
🐪 THE GOLDEN CAMEL
Dispatch #12: Back in Black(water)
Same Prince. New war. Less paperwork.
⸻
The man once known for founding a private army
now prefers the title: “solutions architect.”
He no longer wears fatigues.
Now it’s a tailored blazer, tan loafers, and a laptop full of violence.
His pitch?
“It’s not a war crime. It’s a services package.”
The camel blinked.
Then took a long sip of glacier-brewed sarcasm.
So necessary…
⸻
His current offerings:
🛬 Deportation flights with loyalty points
🏜️ Private detention zones (BYO jurisdiction)
☁️ Drone diplomacy — now hosted in the cloud
He calls it a pivot.
The camel calls it war, with better branding,
On mankind, no less.
⸻
Leadership style:
• Doesn’t take orders. Offers them.
• Calls oversight “friction.”
• Calls consequences “brand damage.”
• Recently told an audience:
“If the market wants stability, I can deliver.”
The camel coughed out a mouthful of powdered moral relativism,
Still choking, while writing.
⸻
Of course, he’s not alone.
His sister waits just offstage,
converting doctrine into dividends,
school choice into structural decay.
Together, they’re a family business:
Patriotism, LLC — powered by tax breaks and quiet exits.
When asked about conflict of interest,
he smiled and offered a subscription tier.
The camel sighed.
Not because she’s shocked.
Because they always bring slides.
⸻
🪖 Old war, new interface
💼 Same mercenary logic — now VC-backed
📉 Accountability still in beta
⸻
The camel watched.
Not to intervene. Just to witness.
She’s seen these loops before.
The names change.
The PowerPoint gets prettier.
But the kill list?
That always ships on time.
⸻
Until next time:
If your national security strategy has a freemium model,
you may already be enrolled in Forever War Plus™.
The Golden Camel
Come thirsty. Leave with more questions.🐪✨